Ring tone freakshows

Now I was never a big fan of those ridiculously loud, obnoxious, 5 minute ring tones with songs and screaming frogs or whatever the fuck...I've always had the basic "ring ring" on my cell phone, mostly out of respect for others. I've only found one ring since the inception of ring tones that I think is funny enough, and just barely not annoying enough, to force others to hear when I get a call. But even then I've been considering switching back to the basics. Now I get the defense that personalized ring tones will allow you to know that it's in fact your phone that is ringing, as opposed to the 40 phones in pockets all around you, so I've come up with a solution. As soon as I can convince someone to offer it (if it's not out there somewhere already), I'm going to have my cell phone ring changed to a loud sneeze. That way, not only do I not offend those around me, but they actually bless me whenever anyone calls.